Page 1 of 22 12311 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 431

Thread: Emile Heskey

  1. #1
    космонавт-исследователь boz-monaut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 1991
    Posts
    456,916,366

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    1,889
    Hopefully he can at least take zwanwijk out in the derby

  3. #3
    brutally rapes small, cute dogs parksey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    2,335
    heskeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

    yyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

  4. #4
    Senior Member militiamon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    2,627
    inb4 someone says "Heskey's Esky's"


    Looking at you pv4

  5. #5
    Senior Member militiamon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    2,627
    Also he's no Griff, but Heskey is the biggest signing we've made without a doubt.

    Good work I say.

    Edit: And re costs, consider that Culina was signed on over $0.9 mil per season, Nick Carle was on $0.6 mil for SFC I think, John Aloisi was on $1.4 mil for SFC back in the day, we offered Kewell $2 million. Signing one of the most well known English footballers of the last decade for $1.4 mil doesn't seem so bad.
    Last edited by militiamon; 19-09-2012 at 02:24 PM.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    6,090
    Heskey will rip a-league defences a new one. Great signing.

  7. #7
    infant member plague's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    14,069
    Quote Originally Posted by Tommyjet View Post
    Hopefully he can at least take zwanwijk out in the derby
    Best way to win us over.


    In other news: I love Vigs and miss him terribly.

  8. #8
    his haikus are shit pistolpete's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    718
    Happy with the signing and hope he goes well. Concerned where the money is coming from though. All well and good to sign a marquee player but if the team folds midseason when Tinks does the runner who is going to pay the bills?

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Merewether
    Posts
    5,568
    Quote Originally Posted by pistolpete View Post
    Happy with the signing and hope he goes well. Concerned where the money is coming from though. All well and good to sign a marquee player but if the team folds midseason when Tinks does the runner who is going to pay the bills?
    This...Heskey is worth $1 mill but Smeltz was not worth $400,000 ?

  10. #10
    Senior Member cobra23's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    793
    Fantastic signing,

    Definetly will have the best and most powerful shot in the league

  11. #11
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    LAKE MACQUARIE NSW AUSTRALIA.
    Posts
    141
    NOW,thats what i call a signature!!
    What an awesome coup to get Emile,EPL and euro clubs were chasing him.
    Great boost for tha Jets, his knowledge and experience will be invaluable,especially to the younger
    guys that have signed.
    Make no mistake,he can fuxxn score goals,as long as he stays injury free.

  12. #12
    Occasional Podcaster furns's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Branxton
    Posts
    4,974
    Quote Originally Posted by Jetmaster View Post
    This...Heskey is worth $1 mill but Smeltz was not worth $400,000 ?
    You do realise the members of the advisory board responsible for that decision are no longer there?
    Subscribe to The Jetstream Podcast http://www.newcastlefootball.net/podcast

  13. #13
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    1,751
    Really happy with this signing.

    Not sure how many goals he will score, but he will be providing those around him with bucketloads of opportunity.

    Add in his experience to pass on to the younger element of the squad and it really should be a good move by the Jets.

  14. #14
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    347
    Think this could be a really good signing - shame we couldnt get griff, but I think Heskey has the potential to tear this league up and at worst he may be comedy gold judging by the jokes in the english press.

    • A prisoner on Death Row in Utah has been allowed to choose his firing squad. He has chosen Heskey.
    • The England football team go to a theatre in Cape Town to relax. Suddenly Emile gets up and walks on to the stage. Fabio Capello shouts, “Heskey! What are you doing up there?” Heskey replies, “Doing what you said boss. Holding up the play.”
    • Emile gets a part-time job at a zoo and the keeper, aware of the striker’s reputation for a lack of pace, tells him to take care of the tortoises. Later the keeper pops to see how Emile is doing and finds him standing by an empty enclosure, sobbing. “Where have all the tortoises gone?” asks the keeper. Emile shrugs and says: “I just opened the door and whoooossh!!!”
    • It’ll be nice for Emile when he weds Chantelle Tagoe. It’ll make a change to hear “Mrs Heskey” instead of “Heskey misses”.
    • Emile plans to open a pub when he retires – because he’s great at putting shots over the bar.
    • Today in England training, Heskey’s 1,000 shots all hit the net. Shame they were playing tennis.
    • What’s the difference between the BP oil spill and Heskey? The oil spill posed a threat to the United States.
    • A fan was chuffed when he got Emile’s autograph after a match. The next week, he accosted him again and got another signature. After the following game he tried to get it again. Heskey said, “This is the third time you’ve asked for my autograph. What’s going on?” “Well,” said the man, “If I get eight more of yours I can swap them for one of Wayne Rooney’s.”
    • A Nigerian player arrived at Aston Villa. During training the manager kept saying: “Foot, ball, goal – foot, ball, goal,” while pointing at his foot, the ball then the goal. The Nigerian said: “Don’t speak so slowly, I speak perfect English.” Then the manager told him, “I wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to Emile.”
    • Robert Green faced over 100 shots in training today without conceding a goal. Tomorrow, he and Heskey will train with the rest of the squad.
    • A spectator got into the England dressing room after the England v Algeria game. A few unsettling minutes passed before the team realised it was just Emile.
    • The new Emile Heskey Subbuteo playing piece was released today and the likeness is uncanny — especially that big block of concrete around his feet.

  15. #15
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    1,351
    As a Jets supporter we all know not to get too carried away with any Marquee sgning, even though it is one has played many years in the EPL and a couple of World Cups with over 60 caps for England. We all have to be patient and allow him time to settle in both on the park with his new team and off the park in his new surroundings. A player of Emile Heskey's stature and the money he will be on, I would expect to be making an impact by round 8. If not scoring goals, then at least contributing and creating goals for others.

  16. #16
    космонавт-исследователь boz-monaut's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 1991
    Posts
    456,916,366
    Mario Balotelli ‏@MarioBaloltelli
    So it's official, Emile Heskey has joined Newcastle Jets. He was of course supposed to join Newcastle United but completely missed.

  17. #17
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    6,410
    bahahahahahaha.

  18. #18
    Occasional Podcaster furns's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Branxton
    Posts
    4,974
    Ill pay that
    Subscribe to The Jetstream Podcast http://www.newcastlefootball.net/podcast

  19. #19
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    6,410
    he'll kill you if you don't.

  20. #20
    in awe of baz GazFish35's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    6,421
    @layles89

    I'm just scared he'll miss the pen when he goes to sign the contract.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •