Griffology

makes you cry doesn't it...beautiful

Quote:

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Originally Posted by hawk

anyone got the griffo lords prayer?
something about "our griff who art in number 9"...

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That was on V1 of the forums I think. Shame it got lost

who composed it?

It's probably time for the New Testament anyway...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by sanchez

Sorry for the late reply, I have experimented furiously over the last 24 hours with an assortment of lubricants (all to the image of Griff's grand final winning goal). Please see my findings;

The preference of noodle grease really depends on the stroke rate and the emotion of the pull. As we all know they vary from the furious tug, which I personally label "the vengeful Griff" to the more majestic, somewhat graceful "Griffantasy". Both enjoyable in their own element.

For the vengeful Griff, I would highly suggest something industrial and robust - http://www.mobilindustrial.com/ind/english/ ... anything less I find does not stand up to the tests of the Griff factor. Too much friction and you'll lose some bark at the very least, possibly your whole stalk may fly off across the room landing squarely on your favourite Griff poster.

The Griffantasy is an easy one. Gypsy tears - sourced from directly from Gosford if possible. While using this for any non-Griff related self-gratification would otherwise instantly lead to HIV infection, luckily the Griff factor which occupies your thoughts in the process acts as an impenatrable antibody that not only protects you from disease, but acts as a penis growth hormone and somewhat strengthens your bell-end with Griff-like capabilities. As an added touch the saltiness of these tears add an unmatchable tingling sensation in and around your Jap's eye.

Happy yankin'.

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6,000,000 of 6,000,000 people found this review helpful.

I didn't wanna lay false claim, but I think I was led to this passage in a Griff-induced vision.

That being said, my memory is woeful at the best of times, especially for such an out-of-body experience such as this 6 (?) years ago...

Version 2?



Our striker, who art in number 29
Griffo be thy name.
Thy goals will come, thy will be done
On pitch as it is in training.
Give us this day our daily Griff,
and lead us not into Bluetongue
As we forgive those who deny your Grand Final efforts.
Now and at the hour of your substitution.

Amen.

i do not forgive those who deny His grand final efforts

Quote:

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Originally Posted by WolfMan

Version 2?



Our striker, who art in number 29
Griffo be thy name.
Thy goals will come, thy win be done
On pitch as it is in training.
Give us this day our daily Griff,
and lead us not into Bluetongue
As we forgive those who deny your Grand Final efforts.
Now and at the hour of your substitution.

JGriff.

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I feel better now.

what has adam ever done for us?

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Originally Posted by belchardo

what has adam ever done for us?

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He scored against the scum

Quote:

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Originally Posted by belchardo

what has adam ever done for us?

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we'd better scrap that.

I just realised that the above Griff's Prayer is a bastardised amalgamation of 2 separate "traditional" prayers. I'll post 2x amended versions post-work.

My Catholicism, she's a bit scratchy haha

OK, rehashed it to reflect the "original" more correctly

Our striker who art in number 29,
Griffo be thy name.
Thy goals will come.
Thy will be done, on pitch as it is in training.
Give us this day our daily Griff.
And forgive us our ignorance,
as we forgive those who deny your Grand Final efforts.
And lead us not into Bluetongue,
but deliver us from Finals.
For thine is the City, and the Emerald,
and the Green, for ever and ever.

Amen.


And a new addition,

Mother Griffiths, full of grace,
The Griff is with thee;
blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Joel.
Holy Griffiths, mother of Griff,
pray for us supporters,
now and at the end of the season.

Amen.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by WolfMan

OK, rehashed it to reflect the "original" more correctly

Our striker who art in number 29,
Griffo be thy name.
Thy goals will come.
Thy will be done, on pitch as it is in training.
Give us this day our daily Griff.
And forgive us our ignorance,
as we forgive those who deny your Grand Final efforts.
And lead us not into Bluetongue,
but deliver us to Finals.
For thine is the City, and power of Emerald and Cinnamon
for ever and ever.

Amen.

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tweaked the last 2

Yeh nice one Hawk. Reads better with those changes

Shouldn't it be deliver us to finals rather than deliver us from finals?

And isn't emerald and green the same colour????

Correct, massive oversight. Emerald and Cinnamon.

I guess "To finals" makes more sense as well

done. too much thught not enough checking, lol.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by joel31

He scored against the scum

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and you call yourself Joel?

You do know Griff has scored all our goals against the Gypos and our only grand final winning goal...well you should know anyway.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by WolfMan

OK, rehashed it to reflect the "original" more correctly

Our striker who art in number 29,
Griffo be thy name.
Thy goals will come.
Thy will be done, on pitch as it is in training.
Give us this day our daily Griff.
And forgive us our ignorance,
as we forgive those who deny your Grand Final efforts.
And lead us not into Bluetongue,
but deliver us from Finals.
For thine is the City, and the Emerald,
and the Green, for ever and ever.

Amen.


And a new addition,

Mother Griffiths, full of grace,
The Griff is with thee;
blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Joel.
Holy Griffiths, mother of Griff,
pray for us supporters,
now and at the end of the season.

Amen.

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Onya Wolfy, reigniting the faith of Griffologists around the globe.

You truly are a disciple of the only true religion.

Oi, remember that Griffology facebook page from back in the day? The one that was started by legit nutcases :rof:

lolwut?? Dun remember this?

BTW, wtf is this page doing at the bottom of my "new posts"???

Let's bump this spider monkey up the soup line.

They were some religious nutcases who had strayed from the true path.

Pretty sure I remember you describing them as "poo pushers" on their page, lol.

Haha, nice Juan.

While Griff returning is obviously the best bit about Griff returning, I just want to thank the Griff Almighty for bringing sanchez back to the foz. Praise be to the Griff

The Griff works in mysterious ways.

I'm pretty sure the last time I was on the foz before my return, was to pray to Griff to end my 2 year goal scoring drought.

No word of a lie, I scored that day in an uncanny Griff-like fashion. A true and utter Griffacle.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by sanchez

Currently in my longest goal scoring dry-spell. I believe this is punishment for wavering in my praise for Griff and not fulfilling the faithful duties as a devout Griffologist.

I beg for your forgiveness oh mighty Griff and pray that upon my sincere return to the serene shade of your mighty todger you grant me a goal in tomorrow's match.

The people of Newcastle are overdue for a Griffacle and I'm overdue for a goal.

Love ya Griff.

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lolz, there it is...can't argue with the facts baby!

Griffacles happen.

This is appropriate in so many ways. The new Griff anthem..."Griffacle"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DQEv0Uf8swI

Quote:

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AUS 9/301 defeat ENG 8/300

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Griff did that. Praise be to Griff.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by sanchez

Griff did that. Praise be to Griff.

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Praise Griff, can He cure our team and coaching staff of Super Mega AIDS??

One thing is for sure he will show more ticka than those out there last night. He will also have the balls to rip into those that need to be ripped into

Soon "Argyle House" will return to being "Fanny's", the Violater will be violating again, Hamma's beard will be back, and Shitman will be shitting himself in overnight lockups...

Order will be restored.

Dearest Griff who art in 29.

I understand why you may not be providing your clearance for tomorrow's game as an act of vengeance. I too am furious about the waivering faith of many Griffologists. This page is evidence enough of a clear lack of devoution. Inconsistent at best one may say.

I pray to you tonight to forgive those sinners and see fit to grant yourself the clearance we so desperately crave. I call upon all Griffologists to grovel at your cyber feet through the Griffology thread and plead you grant them mercy, for the world needs nothing more than your presence in Gosford tomorrow.

Praise be to Griff. May eternity serve the divine, the only, Griff.

ffs, you c*nts serious? No Griff love since my last visit.

Don't know why I bother. Clearly we don't deserve Griff. Blasphemy.

Soz sanch, I've been a bit busy tending to my Joel Griffiths tumblr account.

http://****yeahjoelgriffiths.tumblr.com/

Edit: lol, swear filter :rof:

haha, well at least you've got a good excuse for not attending church.

What about you other blokes? Griff ain't pleased.

No goals for you.
http://theidiotspeaketh.com/wp-conte.../Soup-Nazi.jpg

Dear Griff

Score a couple of Goals today for the great people of Newy

Amen MFKS

Loving the Griff :lulzturtle::yay:

Griff,

I shall not be able to attend the match tonight to witness your return. Please forgive me and by your grace I hope to catch as much footage of you as possible as I feed those unfortunate enough to have not seen the light of Griff. Please deliver us from last week's filth into a new era of Griffness.

Praise be to Griff.